If only he knew
by Shadowzamy
Summary: If only he knew... Oneshot, HaoxYoh, Character death.


Disclaimer: I do not own shaman king.

Warnings: Character death, HaoxYoh

xXx

Yoh looked up at the cloudy sky and tried to hold back his tears. Today everything was lost, His world had vanished, _He_ had died. Yoh stifled back a sob as he finally let go of the others hand, he had been holding on to him until his last breath. Yoh looked down sadly at the corpse that was once his brother, he should be laying there right now not him. Yoh had to push back his tears as he walked out of the star sanctuary, his friends were waiting for him. Yoh couldn't let any of them know how he really felt, they just wouldn't understand. Yoh walked up to his friends who rushed over to see him, they were asking a lot of questions, mostly about the fight. Yoh smiled, it was a fake smile but no one could tell the difference, he smiled and told them the _good news_, that Hao was dead. They all cheered and praised him for defeating the pyromaniac, Yoh merely gave a small laughed as a reply, and as the smile before it was fake. He walked back home with them, acting as though nothing was wrong, if only they knew. If only they knew how every smile he showed felt like the sky had fallen down on him. If only they knew that every laugh he made was slowly tearing him apart. If only they knew that the one who they had all hated and despised was also the one who Yoh loved the most. But they didn't know, they all just kept laughing and enjoying the fact that Hao was finally gone. Yes, he was gone. It was late now and everyone else had already gone to sleep. Yoh was wide awake however, how could anyone expect him to sleep after what had happened, after what he had done. Yoh slowly got out of bed so that he wouldn't wake anyone else in the house. He quietly walked out the front door, closing and locking it behind him. As Yoh walked down the forest path he herd a couple of wolf howl in harmony without a care in the world. Yoh looked up at the night sky, despite the clouds, the stars were still shining brightly. Stars, Hao had loved watching the stars, the two of them would often go stargazing together when there was a clear sky. That was back when he was alive though, that was back when they were still together. Yoh found himself no longer able to hold in his tears that he had kept hidden sense Hao had died. Yoh wept for his lost brother and mourned for his death. Tears were falling down his cheeks as he continued to remember the times that they had once shared. Everything would work out, that was what Yoh would normally say in this situation. Hao had once said that his belief that everything would work out was naïve. Yoh had merely laughed his comment at the time, but now he understood that Hao was right. With Hao gone, nothing would ever work out. If only he knew that this was going to happen, he would have never left home today. If only he knew that Hao was going to die, he would have never let him go the night before. If only he knew that he would end up being the one who killed him, he would have died by Hao's last attack instead. But Yoh was not psychic, so he didn't know. Yoh stood up and began walking once again, he wanted to go back, back to the ways that they were before. Hao would have laughed at such a childish belief, Hao, if only he was here now. Yoh still remembered the last moments that he spent with Hao. Hao was lying on the grass, bleeding to death from the wound that he gave him, he ran over to Hao and desperately tried to stop the bleeding. Hao stopped him and gave a weak smirk before saying that it was too late. Yoh looked down at Hao in disbelief, it couldn't be possible, Hao was dying and it was all his fault. Hao looked up at Yoh and said "I think, that things are better this way... At least now it wont hurt anymore... I just want... you to know one thing before I go, Otouto... I have and always will love you." Yoh tried not to cry as he watched the light begin to fade from Hao's eyes, he only watched silently as Hao passed on to the netherworld, alone. If only he knew that these memory would come back to him every night. If only he knew that Hao's last words would stay with him for the rest of his life. If only he knew that not speaking when he had the chance, would haunt him forever. But he didn't know, so he was never able to tell Hao those five little words before he died.

"I love you too, Aniki."

XxX

Yoh: You're upset aren't you?

Me: Yea...

Yoh: What about?

Me:...

Yoh: You're not gonna say?

Me: No...

Yoh: Please review.


End file.
